Its been a while since i wrote anything. i was in my own state of level. i wasn’t bad but i wasn’t good but i could keep going. Then everything starts at once.
Firstly i got a phone call from a lady who is my shrink basically. We are going to meet on Friday and she is going to fix me. And its always going to be her. I need it to always be her or i cant do it. But it means i have to move my work around and i have to get there and at some point i am going to run out of excuses. Im sort of excited in a weird way but also dreading it 100%. We shall see what happens, i think as Friday draws closer i am going to get more and more nervous. Coincidentally im seeing A on Thursday so maybe she will be able to make me feel better about the whole situation.